Ciara and Russell Wilson’s Engagement Proves Waiting to ‘Put Out’ Isn’t a Crazy Idea – Huffington Post

7 months ago Comments Off on Ciara and Russell Wilson’s Engagement Proves Waiting to ‘Put Out’ Isn’t a Crazy Idea – Huffington Post

More than 2,000 years on, the adage is still true. Just to posit the transformation in musical terms, I wonder sometimes how we went from Hot Chocolate’s funky “Sexy Thing” in the 1970s, Marvin Gaye’s romantic 1980s Grammy Award-winning “Sexual Healing” and Salt ‘N’ Pepa’s educational “Let’s Talk About Sex” to straight up misogynistic modern day anthems and club bangers glorifying abusive hook-ups, coercive sex and domestic violence found in the likes of Lil Wayne’s “Bitches and Bottles,” Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” and Eminem and Rihanna’s “Love the Way You Lie.”

This it seems are the “values” that infuse popular culture and those with public platforms back them up. Khloe Kardashian’s views, recently aired on Kocktails With Khloe, that Ciara and Wilson’s public acknowledgement of their celibacy seems like a stunt was insensitive, though are unfortunately likely shared by many others.

“With all due respect to Ciara, she has a baby. It’s not like we don’t know if she’s a virgin or not,” Kardashian said. 

Err, that’s actually not very respectful Khloe. Thankfully, she got hold of herself and walked back her criticism of the newly-engaged couple’s personal choice. Even though she says the comment was taken out of context, those words still came out of her mouth and came across as a classic “pull her down” move.  

Just as her sister Kim vented recently that the world should stop slut-shaming her for a sex video she made over a decade ago, so too should the likes of Khloe get heat for cherry-shaming Ciara, just because she is celibate though she isn’t a virgin and gave birth to a child outside marriage. It’s disappointing and counter-productive when people (read: women) tear each other down for simply having the audacity to try and be a better woman today than who she may have been yesterday.

Ciara and Wilson’s apparently unusual decision to enter into a relationship premised on mutual affection, respect and emotional intimacy, shouldn’t be shocking, and is happily having its moment in the sun right now. It was also a choice made by Hollywood actress Megan Good and her film executive husband, Devon Franklin, and inspired the Christian couple to write their recently-released book The Wait. It’s heartening to see that public figures are championing the celibate lifestyle, especially as they’re a whisper in a cacophony of sexual hedonism.

Any naysayers out there are of course entitled to their critiques about the value of waiting to have sex. There is no doubt that when sex is good it’s amazingly good, and who doesn’t want to feel amazing? However, sex can also come with heartache and confusion for those who are looking for intimacy and mistake sex for affection, commitment, love and other warm, fuzzy feelings. It also comes with the real risk of sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancy. Whether or not you believe in God, or are Christian, that’s a thought worth considering.

Ciara and Russell Wilson’s Engagement Proves Waiting to ‘Put Out’ Isn’t a Crazy Idea – Huffington Post